Dracula Sucks (1979)

... aka: Coming of Dracula's Bride, The

... aka: Dracula's Bride

... aka: Dracula... ti succhio (Dracula... I'll Suck You)

... aka: Dracula X

... aka: Eruption

... aka: Le vampire X

... aka: Liebling, du beißt so gut (Darling, You Suck So Well)

... aka: Lust at First Bite

Directed by:

Phillip Marshak

There are many different versions of this film; some with more nudity and sex (both hard and softcore) and some with more blood and violence, on the market. Not only that, but depending on the edit, dub and country of release, you could be watching an incoherent porn movie, a dead serious horror film, a comedy spoof, or an incredibly awkward mixture of all three! Usually it's the latter. This is a highly-confused tonal mishmash coming from filmmakers who don't appear to know what kind of film they're even making. It's no surprise then to learn that five different writers are credited (not including Mr. Bram Stoker) and, according to at least one cast member, the film was in the process of being rewritten while shooting was going on. That's always a recipe for success!

What we'll be covering here today is the 95 minute version (under the title Dracula Sucks) that was released by Vinegar Syndrome in 2022, which contains all of the horror content but only some of the hardcore sex footage. I will provide some brief details about the other versions down below if you're interested, but the VS release is certainly going to be the version most people will be seeing nowadays. This is also one of those instances where there's really no approximation of a definitive director's cut. The intent all along appears to have been to prep multiple releases from this one shoot; a horror / soft sex exploitation film and second as a straight porn film. Scenes steering it in one direction or another are utilized when needed for different markets.

Irene Renfield (Pat Manning) brings her mentally deranged adult son Richard aka "Dickie" (Richard Bulik) to Sewards Sanitarium, a castle mental institution in the middle of the California desert run by crippled, monocled Dr. Arthur Seward (John Leslie) and his sister, Dr. Sybil Seward (Kay Parker, of Taboo fame). Later that night, Dickie hears the voice of his dead father calling to him. He's lured outside and into another cobweb-filled estate called Carfax Abbey, cracks open a casket and removes a stake from the heart of Count Dracula (a bearded Jamie Gillis), reviving him and somehow simultaneously resurrecting his two vampire brides in the process. Dracula then bites Dickie, with hopes of making him a loyal servant just like his father before him had been. He's found the next day crawling around outside behaving like even more of a lunatic than before and has to be restrained in a straight jacket.

Coinciding with Dracula's arrival in the area are a number of guests showing up for a protracted stay at the sanitarium, including Dr. Seward's sweet, virginal niece, Mina (the lovely Annette Haven), her bland "homo" fiance Jonathan Harker (Paul Thomas) and Mina's saucy college acquaintance, Lucy Webster (Serena), who isn't quite as innocent as her buddy. Also prominently featured are Seward's intern, Dr. Peter Bradley (Mike Ranger), maid-diddling physician Dr. John Stoker (John Holmes), nurse Betty Lawson (Seka, in her X-rated film debut), Austrian scientist Dr. Van Helsing ("Detlef van Berg" - more on him later), a couple of orderlies (co-writer William Margold [whose screen appeal is virtually nil as usual] and hairdresser / make-up artist / prop man Martin L. Dorf) and a couple of black servants; a nameless maid (Irene Best) and chauffeur Jarvis (David Lee Bynum), who breaks into "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" while Serena gives Ranger a blowjob out on the patio (!) and seems to be attempting to channel Mantan Moreland with his cartoonish performance.

Most of the patients at the asylum, who were once well on the road to recovery, have suddenly gotten worse... and now have some strange puncture wounds on their necks for obvious reasons. Aside from Renfield, who has to be kept restrained, there's a woman whose mind has regressed to that of an 8-year-old, a cowboy and a Nazi. Van Helsing chimes in that "Ninety-nine perzent of all 'uman eells is chronic constipation!" and comes up with a possible solution: "I zuggest varm vater enemas!" As the cast are killed off one by one, Dracula zeroes in on Mina, who he'd like to add to his vampire harem.

While seeing a film of this nature with some atmosphere, decent 35mm cinematography, passable production values and good shooting locations, art direction, props and costumes is certainly a novelty (consult virtually any shot-on-video 80s vampire-themed porno quickie for comparison purposes), the movie itself is extremely uneven bordering on irritating much of the time. In fact, this actually may be the most disappointing horror porn hybrid I've ever watched. Yes, there are worse... most actually are far worse than this, but nobody is expecting quality from a one-day-wonder from the video era. This film actually has quality components, and had a budget, so watching the good things getting trampled over by inept writing, direction, sound and editing here is almost painful to endure. And speaking of painful, the non-stop "comic" voice-overs (inner monologues from various characters, intercom and radio voices...) are the absolute worst!

On the plus side, there are bits here and there that are tasteless, outrageous, nasty and / or just weird enough to kind of work. The most memorable of these seem to revolve around Holmes, who gets his giant penis bitten after having sex on a pool table with the vampirized maid and then is involved in a rough, bloody rape scene with Seka. Another crazy bit features Serena sitting on the toilet when Gillis barges into the bathroom, hypnotizes her and then masturbates after biting her on the tit and urinating all over her. In the 95 minute version, the more explicit bits from this scene are only shown in brief shots with some kind of reverse image / solarization effect added.

You also get a vampire girl biting a rabbit, rabbits humping, a rubber bat, bloody bite wounds on crotches, Vaseline-smeared hallucination sequences, sibling incest, necrophilia, flubbed lines (Leslie even mixes up character names at one point) and forced male-on-male oral, though that's hidden behind Dracula's cape.

While most of the top adult film stars from this period are present and accounted for (none of whom rise above fair in the acting department), more attention is usually bestowed upon the previously mentioned and pseudonymous "Detlef van Berg." Having mainstream actors in hardcore porn movies was a rarity back then, so seeing 70-something Austrian-born character actor Reggie Nalder, who'd previously acted for Alfred Hitchcock, Federico Fellini, John Frankenheimer and other esteemed directors, playing Dr. Van Helsing was a surprise. Nalder (thankfully!) doesn't participate in any of the sex scenes but he does have to spout a lot of embarrassing dialogue about bowel movements and mixing semen with blood. The good news for him is that immediately after appearing in this, he'd land one of his most famous roles as the vampire Kurt Barlow in the Stephen King adaptation Salem's Lot (1979). 

In an interview with David Del Valle conducted some time in the late 80s (and first published in a 1993 issue of Video Watchdog), Nalder called his time on the film "a very nerve-wracking experience" because of the constant rewrites ("Nobody knew their lines...") and the constant sex, both on and off set. He likened the whole thing to "an orgy."

Though no great talent, director Marshak seems to have been an interesting character in real life. He was a Korean War vet and entrepreneur who started several small businesses before attending Lee Strasberg school acting classes in New York, studying film at UCLA, opening one of the very first gay bars in Los Angeles (along with his wife) and making pseudo-arty shorts, mainstream features and a number of bizarre-o hardcore films. 

One of his earliest efforts - Savages (1971) - was a violent bisexual western (!) with both straight and gay sex and rape scenes. He co-directed the truly weird R-rated horror film Cataclysm (1980), a troubled production best known - in heavily truncated form - as one of stories in the notoriously bad anthology NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR (1985). Some other ultra-obscure titles from him appear to have disappeared off the face of the planet. IAFD currently attributes a 1985 version of Frankenstein starring John Holmes (!) to him that is nowhere to be seen. Cine Mag (a more reliable source than IAFD) lists him as director of a million-dollar-budgeted Canadian production called Dante's Inferno (1982) starring John Ireland, which is also missing in action. And there is perhaps even more...

Combing through filmographies and browsing through a couple of other films, I think I've made a little discovery along the way: Marshak probably had even more X-rated credits under his belt than what many realize. You can link him directly to a mysterious chap who operated in the late 80s called "Max Schenk" or "Max Schreck." Not only do all of the "Schenk"-credited films feature Bulik (usually billed as "Long Chainy") in a non-sexual, acting-only capacity, but so do most of the Marshak films. There are also some thematic similarities. Marshak seemed to be a bit obsessed with Nazis as they figure into this film, Cataclysm and his later porn film Blue Ice (1985), which incidentally also features Nalder. Again, same can be said for a number of the "Schenk" films, like The Sex Life of Mata Hari (1988) and She Wolves of the SS (1989). One of the others is called (hmmm...) Hitler Sucks (1988). So, if I were a betting man, I'd place my chips on Mr. Schenk and Mr. Marshak being one in the same.

Phillip isn't the only Marshak in the credits. His son, Darryl A. Marshak, co-wrote the script, was one of the producers and receives a credit as third assistant director. He would go on to become a talent manager representing the likes of Leonardo DiCaprio, James Franco, Hillary Swank, Alice Cooper and David Bowie (!) over the years. His other son, Shane Marshak, is credited as assistant best boy. Thanked in the end credits are parents Mr. and Mrs. Bernard Marshak, Phil's wife Pamela Marshak and his daughter, Tracy Marshak, who went on to co-star (as "Tracy Lea") in the minor cult item Desperate Teenager Lovedolls (1984) and its sequel Lovedolls Superstar (1986) before becoming a production accountant. Hey, ya gotta love seeing families spending quality time together, whether that be mandatory dinners at the dining room table, trips to Disney World or shooting porno vampire movies at a castle in the desert.

Associate producer and editor Nettie Peña, another UCLA film / theater grad, went on to make the slasher Home Sweet Home (1980) starring bodybuilder and fitness guru Jake Steinfeld. The camera operator was Ray Dennis Steckler film regular Titus Moede, Norman Thaddeus Vane (1983's FRIGHTMARE) was the second assistant director and Gillis and Leslie are credited as additional third assistant directors.

 

 

As for all of those alternate versions out there... An R-rated cut eliminating all of the hardcore material but still featuring full frontal nudity was released to theaters and on VHS here in America by both Media and Unicorn with a running time of 88 minutes. In other countries, such as the UK, it was whittled down to as little as 73 minutes. In 1980, a 75-minute new version titled either Lust at First Bite (its most common VHS title) or Dracula's Bride was released. This cut (which Vinegar Syndrome has included as an extra in the same release) is a complete re-edit of the film that shuffles the scene order around. Most of the plot, violence and blood are thrown out and lengthy explicit sex scenes that were filmed at the same time but not present in the earlier R-rated version or the 95 minute X version reviewed here are substituted in their place. This is likely the same cut that was released (dubbed) in France under the new title Dracula X. I have no clue what the South Korean VHS release (hilariously re-titled "Dracula Sucks Buttocks and Bossoms [sic]") featured. Fans of the film have put together composites of footage found in the various releases and the running time is well over 2 hours.

Though usually given an incorrect 1978 release date, this actually debuted in early 1979. Gillis would get to play Count Dracula yet again in Shaun Costello's Dracula Exotica (1980; aka Love at First Gulp). He was also in the vampire-themed PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT (1990).

★★

Black Room, The (1982)

... aka: Himon musta huone (The Black Room of Lust)

... aka: Kammer der Schrecken (Chamber of Secrets)

... aka: La chambre noire

... aka: La habitación negra

Directed by:

Elly Kenner

Norman Thaddeus Vane ([supposed] co-director)

Thirty-something Larry (Jimmy Stathis) is feeling unfulfilled with the boring everyday rituals of life. It's work as a stationary supply salesman during the day, then unruly kids and a compromised sex life at night. Rinse and repeat. Still, it's extremely difficult to view this man as being anything other than completely selfish. His wife, Robin (Clara Perryman), puts in every effort possible to please this guy. She's pretty, pleasant, has a delightfully sarcastic sense of humor, is uncommonly open-minded and anything but frigid. She describes her sexual history and fantasies openly and even giddily, is willing to try new things and does everything she can to keep things active in the bedroom. Problem is, their kids - Mark (Bill Anglemyer) and Jenny (Allisun Kale) - are almost comically insufferable brats. Every time the couple attempt to be intimate they're met with laughing and screaming coming from the other bedroom. Apparently these little buggers never go to sleep! They also constantly whine about things like their dinner and intentionally spill their drinks ("I hate milk!") any time the couple try to show affection toward one another. I'm sure there's some fucked up Freudian thing going on here that I probably don't even want to know about.

Jason's temporary escape from his family drama, mundane job and modest suburban home in Van Nuys is to shell out 200 bucks a month to rent a room in a secluded mansion in the Hollywood Hills. But not just any room, this is a specially designed "fantasy" room with a zillion candles, black velvet drapes covering the walls, a state of the art stereo system, a glowing coffee table (which is actually pretty awesome), mirrors and lots of pillows and comfy bedding. This place is clearly designed for sex and sex only. The mansion owners; siblings Jason (Stephen Knight - THE WITCHING), a photographer, and Bridget (Cassandra Gava), a model, promise privacy and complete discretion. Larry can come and go as he pleases, and bring whoever he wants there. They'll even prepare the room for him in advance by providing wine, fresh flowers, music and such. When Larry happens upon a bored college girl hitchhiker named Lisa (Charlie Young), who wants to have a quick fling and "get wrecked" as those wild 80s kids apparently used to say, Larry is happy to oblige, and now he's got the perfect place to do it!

Interestingly, when Larry returns home from one of his little romps, he tells wife Robin all about them, and all about his "black room," to get her in the mood. Of course, she has no clue he's actually renting this room and doing all of these things in real life and believes it's all just some elaborate fantasy. All she knows is that they've recently had an improved sex life since "the black room" has entered the picture, so she plays along with it. But Robin isn't the only one being left in the dark. Larry has no clue what his new landlords are up to either... but it's anything but normal!

Jason and Bridget use a two-way mirror to spy on, and take photos of, Larry and his various conquests... and that's just the START of it. The seductive Bridget easily sinks her claws into Larry (the first day they meet) and the two are soon using the room for kinky activities that involve pretend bull riding, feathered headdresses and body paint. As for Jason, he has a very rare inherited blood disease called thalassemia (a real disorder), where he doesn't produce enough hemoglobin and red blood cells. That requires regular blood transfusions, which have recently increased to twice weekly.

As opposed to just going to the hospital, he prefers his transfusions to be as fresh as possible, though perhaps not under the most sanitary of conditions. The siblings are actually utilizing the space to procure victims (using drugs and chloroform to subdue them) and many of the ladies Larry brings there end up being the unwilling blood donors. Their bodies are hooked to up an elaborate blood pumping machine and drained completely dry before being buried in coffins up in the hills.

After discovering Larry's dirty little secret, Robin makes a copy of his room key and decides to pay a visit to the mansion. There, she encounters Jason, who doesn't hesitate to tell her exactly what her husband has been up to. In fact, he shows her through the two-way mirror when Larry invites Lisa back, this time accompanied by her boyfriend Terry (Christopher McDonald in one of his first roles), for a little drug-fueled three way action. Initially shocked and saddened, Robin decides to flip the script on her cheating spouse and use the room herself to give Larry a (deserved!) taste of his own medicine. Eventually the couple find themselves handcuffed together in the room and slated to be the next donors, with their kids and babysitter Milly (the underutilized though always welcome Linnea Quigley) also being put in jeopardy.

Though it's been awhile since I last watched this, I've actually been a defender of it for quite some time, even though I've received a little pushback when I included it on a 20 hidden gems of the 80s list. To some, this is a slow, talky, boring film that doesn't really work. To others, it's a fascinating, atmospheric and unique movie that completely stands out for its time. This was the early 80s after all, when major studio, fx-heavy offerings and paint-by-numbers slasher flicks dominated the box office and few films - especially American ones - dared to try to put spins on tired tropes. Finally having a chance to check out the restored Blu-ray release from Vinegar Syndrome has only made me dig my heels in deeper with this one. I'm still gonna defend it. This is a good, and perhaps also somewhat misunderstood, film. It's certainly not perfect, but it's consistently interesting, stylish and provides enough subtext to resonate.

I also appreciate the fact this actually cares enough to make its characters real, flawed people with complexities and insecurities. The sleazy, voyeuristic Jason, who's in the end stage of his life (at least his human one!), has basically entered his idgaf phase and is out to do whatever he pleases. In that regard, he shares some similarities with the disillusioned Larry, who's thrown caution to the wind and put everything at risk because he's dissatisfied following a generic life script. 

Bridget, who's trapped in an unhealthy codependent relationship with her sibling (yep, there are some strong incestuous vibes going on there), ultimately fears being alone, part of the reason she's reluctant to let Larry go, especially with her brother's impending demise on the horizon. Exotic and husky-voiced Filipino-American Gava (best known for her small role as the witch Arnold Schwarzenegger briefly shacks up with in Conan the Barbarian) is highly memorable in this role. She's even given the chance to show off a lot of her professional modeling photos, including the cover of the 1976 Jefferson Starship album Spitfire.

Quite surprisingly given her competition, the most interesting person here is actually Robin, and the little-known Perryman is really great in this part. In most other films this would be a bland side character, but she's actually one of the most progressive mother / housewife characters I've ever seen in an older genre film. This woman is proactive in the extreme! She stands up for herself, she knows her worth, she speaks her mind, she's level-headed yet adventurous, she demands respect for the sacrifices she makes taking care of the house and kids and, while she loves her husband, she's not willing to be a doormat or be disrespected without taking some action herself. Casual everyday conversations, and the occasional arguments, between her and her husband have a really nice naturalistic quality to them and ring true.

According to pretty much everyone who worked on the production, Vane did not actually direct the film proper. Him being being given a "co-director" credit supposedly was part of an agreement he'd made with producer Aaron C. Butler, something that the film's real director, Israeli-born Elly Kenner, knew nothing about during production. Even though no one seems to have very nice things to say about the man (I don't either after reading more about him in Stephen Thrower's Nightmare USA and having already sat through some of his other stuff), he does at least deserve credit for this evocative script. Supposedly it's based on some of his real-life sleazy sexcapades, but I'll leave that up for you to discover on your own if you want all of the sordid details.

The crazy finale manages to somehow both disappoint and impress. In a way, it kind of undermines some of the finer plot points and muddies motivations (or at least makes us rethink them), on the other hand, it's lively and kind of creepy, ending with a flash-edited barrage of black and white shots of resurrecting corpses with color shots of blood pumping. It's definitely... unusual... much like the rest of the film.

Well-shot by future director Robert Harmon (THE HITCHER), this also boasts lots of gliding Steadicam shots courtesy of Jeff Mart, which both add to the dreamy, hazy feel and aid some of the action scenes, notably a great bit where the siblings pursue a half-drained victim (Geanne Frank) who manages to escape their home around the Hollywood hills. The often subdued electronic score is also great. Make-up and special effects from Mark Shostrom, who'd go on to work on a lot of 80s horror favorites like Videodrome, From Beyond, Evil Dead II and the first three Elm Street films, are solid.

After a very limited American theatrical release, Vestron Video issued this on home video in 1985. It was a well-distributed tape like many other Vestron titles and I'm sure audiences back then, probably expecting something more gore-drenched and formulaic, probably didn't know what to make of it. In many ways, I think this fits in better with today's “elevated horror” market than it did back in the 80s as a video rental.

The Vinegar Syndrome Blu-ray (released just last year) is a long-overdue upgrade for this previously forgotten film, which had, until then, only been available as old rental tapes or VHS-sourced online copies, all of which were far too dark. This release rectifies that and also includes a ton of extras, including interviews with actors Stathis and Perryman (who now goes by her married name, Claire Corff, and is a voice teacher), Shostrom, Kenner and production assistant Lisa Cronin (also the daughter of executive producer Doug Cronin, who appears as a victim in the first scene). Thrower is also given a long segment where he basically relays information from his extensive previous interview with Vane (who passed away in 2015) for his book. The only real disappointment here is that they weren't able to track down Gava, Knight or Quigley for a chat, especially since all three of them appear to still be active.

★★★