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Saturday, July 24, 2021

Abducted (1986)

... aka: Abduction
... aka: El salvaje y su presa (The Savage and His Prey)
... aka: Entführt und gepeinigt (Kidnapped and Tormented)
... aka: Jakten (The Hunt)
... aka: Kidnapped
... aka: Terrore nella foresta (Terror in the Forest)

Directed by:
Boon Collins

In the summer of 1984, 22-year-old American biathlon (a sport combining cross country skiing and rifle shooting) competitor Kari Swenson was working a summer job in Montana when she was kidnapped by father-and-son wackos and wanna-be part-time survivalists, who supposedly were keen on eventually forcing her to be the son's wife. Her traumatic ordeal included her being wrapped in a sleeping bag and chained to a tree for the better part of a day and then being shot in the chest at point blank range with a rifle. A few search party members had stumbled upon the kidnappers' camp, one was shot in the face and killed, while Swenson was shot and left for dead. It wouldn't be until four hours later that the critically injured Swenson was located. Her attackers were tracked down months later, convicted and spent many years in prison, while injuries forced Swenson out of the sport she had already set several records in (she was the highest ranked American biathlete for decades) for awhile, though she was able to recuperate and compete again in 1986. Afterward, she became a veterinarian.

This bizarre true life tale was a top news story nearly four decades ago and thus spawned endless newspaper and magazine articles, as well as books and several film adaptations. The "official" recount of the story was the made-for-TV movie The Abduction of Kari Swenson (1987), which starred Tracy Pollan as Swenson and M. Emmet Walsh and Michael Bowen as her abductors, Don and Dan Nichols. Swenson herself served as technical advisor on that version to keep it as accurate as possible. However, exploitation cinema isn't so keen on the details so there were a number of other Swenson-inspired films hoping to cash in. This Canadian effort managed to beat the TV movie version to the punch by a year. It takes major liberties with the actual story whilst still boasting its "true story" credentials.


College student and long distance runner Renee Aldridge (Roberta Weiss) is out jogging in the foggy woods when she senses someone is watching / stalking her. Before she knows it, armed, grizzled, mentally-unhinged mountain man Vern (Lawrence King-Phillips) jumps in front of her, grabs her by the hair and yanks her into forest. When she puts up the slightest bit of resistance, he slaps her in the face, ties a rope around her neck and keeps plodding along. Vern drags Renee deeper into the woods, threatens her with a knife, whips her with a rope, sniffs her, pats her on the ass and hog-ties her when it's time to sleep so she can't run away. By the next day, there's already a large search party with hunters, dogs and a helicopter out scouring the mountains looking for her.








Vern dishes out psychological torment to his captive while also trying to train Renee for her new life living in the wild. An attempt to run away is foiled when she gets lost in the woods at night, basically circles around to where she ran away from and falls asleep. When she awakens, an amused Vern is sitting there waiting for her and informs her he was tracking her the entire time. He makes her climb up a steep cliff, feeds her raw eggs and even allows her to hold his gun while he scours for food; all in an attempt to build up some kind of trust with her while at the same time proving she's basically fucked out there in the middle of nowhere without him and his survival skills. He even saves her from going over a waterfall after she falls into some rapids.








The two eventually make it to Vern's cabin, where she's tied up, forced to lay on animal skins, is taught how to gut and clean their food and informed she's now in her new home and will eventually learn to like it (and him). When he attempts to rip her clothes off and rape her, he has a premature ejaculation issue and cries afterward. In a major deviation from the actual story, Vern's kindly, crippled, nature-lovin', God-fearin' daddy Joe (Dan Haggerty) shows up insisting they immediately return the girl to her parents. We learn a little about Vern's past in foster homes, prisons and institutions, which have all clearly failed him. And we learn a little about Joe, who is guilt-stricken for failing Vern himself when he abandoned him as a child and left him with his promiscuous, neglectful, alcoholic mother to raise. A high school dropout whose own father died at a young age in a logging accident, Joe is now trying to atone for the sins of his past helping his now-deranged son the only way he knows how: removing him from society altogether.

Haggerty's character has a true disdain for wealthy trophy hunters who rent helicopters just so they can gun down endangered Stone sheep, whom he feels a kinship, and an almost spiritual connection, with. On their way to take Renee back to civilization, they cross paths with one such group of "hunters." Renee panics, tries to run to them for help and a frantic Vern shoots and kills one of the hunting party. Later that night, Vern tries to rape Renee yet again, but is run off by Joe. Their journey toward civilization continues with Vern trying to stake his claim over Renee ("You're mine... I killed a man for you!") and becoming increasingly more angry, paranoid and violent.








This is a bizarre film in that it's pure exploitation by the very definition of the word (trying to cash-in on a real-life crime case) yet one that consistently shies away from being overtly exploitative in ways that may engender it some kind of cult following. It's not accurate enough to cut it as a true crime film, not quite tense, exciting or thoughtful enough to entirely work as a serious movie and not lurid or sleazy enough to work as a guilty pleasure trash flick. It is, however, a solidly-crafted film that manages to be entertaining in spite of its shortcomings and has sincere performances from the cast. Weiss is adequate (though her role is insufficiently developed compared to the male leads), Haggerty is actually quite good here and King-Phillips is mostly effective, though he does slide into camp overacting toward the end.

The film's best attribute is lots of gorgeous Canadian scenery, which is wonderfully framed and shot by Robert McLachlan, who'd eventually move on to a prolific career shooting top TV shows like Game of Thrones and Ray Donovan. The unfortunate part is all that's currently available are dark, murky VHS copies. One hopes that this will be cleaned-up and better presented one day.









Abducted received very wide global video distribution in the late 80s and there were video releases all over North and South America (the U. S. release was from Prism), Europe and Japan. Since then, it's been all but completely forgotten.

King-Phillips and Haggerty both returned in the same roles in the easier-to-find and more exploitative sequel; Abducted II: The Reunion (1995), which was made by the same director and writers (Collins and Lindsay Bourne) and was also shot in British Columbia. In that one, Vern kidnaps and terrorizes three former school chums, played by pouty Italian sexpot Raquel Bianca, real-life martial artist Donna Jason and, most notably, Debbie Rochon in an early starring role before she solidified her status as a B-movie horror queen. Both films were shown on USA Up All Night.

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Thursday, July 22, 2021

Xing tao tai lang (1987)

... aka: 捉鬼雜牌軍
... aka: 新桃太郎
... aka: Child of Peach
... aka: Shin Momotaro
... aka: Sword of Sun God, The
... aka: Zhuo gui za pai jun

Directed by:
Chung-Hsing Chao
Chun-Liang Chen

Yesssss! A warrior with magical powers (Fu-Chien Chang), his lovely wife (Bao-Lien Yin) and their newborn baby son live a peaceful and carefree life in the beautiful and fertile mountaintop Peach Garden, along with the child / animal guardians Tiny-Dog (Fu Lai), Tiny-Monkey (Chun Hsiao) and the unfortunately-named Tiny-Cock (Yu-Jiu Yang). In the Peach Garden it's always sunny and warm thanks to the father possessing the powerful, laser-shooting "Sword of Sun." They also have a giant magical peach that always drips nectar and that they can command to do their bidding. However, the evil, flame-haired, vampire-fanged Devil King (Chung-Yu Huang) wants the sword for himself. He and his green-afro'd minions manage to steal it. The garden instantly dies, it starts snowing and the sword is used to murder both the father and mother. Before dying, Madame Peach manages to seal her baby inside the magic peach and orders it to leave and go hide somewhere. She informs a visiting little girl fairy (Shadow Liu) to eventually find her child so he can avenge their deaths.








We then meet a goofy, childless elderly couple; Kung (Tu Chin) and his wife Ah Po (Mei Fang Yu), who keep bickering and blaming each other for why they could never have any kids. The old woman goes to wash laundry by a river and stumbles upon the big peach. During a hilarious scene, it ends up dragging her down a river, over waterfalls and through the forest, catches her ass on fire and then promptly pisses in her face! She ends up back home, where the peach causes problems for her and her husband but finally cracks open to reveal there's an infant inside. Thinking they've finally been blessed by Buddha after all these years, they decide to keep and raise the baby, christening it Peach Kid for obvious reasons.

Meanwhile, Devil King goes down to hell and rescues some eternally damned souls led by cackling old witch named Wu Po (played by male actor Kuang-Yung Lin) and her two dopey dwarf sidekicks. He brings them back up to Earth, where they're outfitted with new rainbow fright wigs and clown make-up (the witch is also given a nifty skull broom that shoots fire like a flamethrower!) and now has his very own army. Their first assignment is to attack a village, which they burn to the ground after slaughtering the parents and kidnapping the children. They then easily take over a castle and kill all the guards. Before long, they've successfully occupied, and now control, over half the land in whatever wacky world this is supposed to be set in.








Because society can't wait forever for the Peach Baby to grow up and it's his destined to oppose the Devil King, the fairy uses her magic to speed the growing process along. The baby becomes a toddler and then a little boy and then a young teenager (played by cherubic-looking actress Hsiao-Lao Lin, who was 17 or 18 years old at the time of filming). In all of his forms, Peach Boy is both amazingly acrobatic and amazingly strong and can do things like split wood with his bare hands and even carry entire trees.

When Princess Apple (Sze-Ping Chen) is kidnapped by the Devil King and his minions and taken to hell, her father announces that anyone who's able to save her will also win her hand in marriage. That offer sounds too good to pass up for portly, virginal King Melon (San Peng) and his men. They're joined by the cowardly priest Bowie (Sun-Young Chen) and his troops and set off on a quest to rescue the girl. When Peach Boy attempts to enlist in their army, he gets rejected and instead meets up with his animal-kid friends monkey, dog and chicken. The bad guys slaughter most at the army camp, save for Melon, who's then forced to follow the child warrior and her sidekicks into battle at Demon Island.









This is really everything it should be: colorful, fast-paced, weird, flashy, enthusiastic, imaginative, filled with action, stunts, wire work, good fight choreography, special effects, garish costumes, spirited performances, variable special effects and, underneath it all, a little bit of heart. There's also a lot of slapstick and childish humor thrown in for the juvenile target audience, like men accidentally drinking dog and monkey piss, farting in faces, biting an ass and the witch taking on the form of the princess so she can seduce "fatty" Melon and make him strip off his clothes. Of course, I could imagine more conservative parents sitting down with their kids to watch this and being aghast at some of the content (not limited to the surprisingly profanity-laden English subtitles), but for everyone else, this delightfully bonkers fantasy holds a lot of entertainment value.









There's a strange (and usually highly amusing) surprise around nearly every corner, including a bad guy who uses a large bag of captured wind as a weapon, laser-shooting skulls, shark-finned men with tridents, a muscleman with a huge spiked club, gory moments like an exploding head and, best of all, a big monster comprised entirely of peaches of varying sizes that does kung fu, fights with lasers and shoots exploding pits out of its mouth! The lead character and most of the story has been swiped from the Japanese folk tale Momotaro ("Peach Boy") and the music score has clearly been inspired by The Neverending Story, right down to the theme song.


Though this Taiwanese production has never even been officially released here in America and didn't set the box office on fire during its theatrical run in Hong Kong it made a lot of money in its home country and especially Japan (where it was re-titled Shin Momotaro and distributed by Bandai) and led to many more similar films. The immediate sequel, Tao da liang da xian shen wei / Magic of Spell (1988), was also made by Chao (who'd previously directed the successful Hello Dracula) and featured some of the same cast and characters. While not an official sequel (and not even containing the Peach Boy character), another Lin vehicle called Feng huang wang zi / Magic Warriors (1989) was released in some quarters as Child of Peach 3 and called Shin Momotaro 3 in Japan.


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