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Thursday, January 16, 2014

Human Race, The (2013)

Directed by:
Paul Hough


Having humans hunted down or faced with death for game, sport and / or entertainment has been a popular theme visited by both writers and filmmakers ever since the release of Richard Connell's short story "The Most Dangerous Game" (also published as "The Hounds of Zaroff") in 1924. Both the story and the definitive screen version; 1932's The Most Dangerous Game starring Joel McCrea, Leslie Banks and Fay Wray and co-directed by Merian C. Cooper and Ernest B. Schoedsack (who made King Kong the following year), have gone on to influence countless later films and novels. Stephen King's very first novel "The Long Walk" (which predated "Carrie" [released in 1974] by a number of years but was published later) involved teenage boys forced to walk at the speed of 4 miles per hour or else face "buying a ticket" (i.e. being shot). King later revisited a similar theme with the 1982 novel "The Running Man;" about game show contestants in a dystopian future being tracked and killed by hunters paid to eliminate them. Five years later, it was turned into an Arnold Schwarzenegger vehicle. Other movies to employ this theme include Death Race 2000 (1975), Battle Royale (2000), Series 7: The Contenders (2001) and the massively popular The Hunger Games (2012), which currently has no less than four sequels in the works. The Human Race joins this line-up of films, but does it manage to distinguish itself?








We first meet a confused, terrified line-up of people standing by a building, who have all been chosen (by whom is made unclear) to participate in a game of chase along a course. The rules are simple. Follow the arrows... or you'll die. Stay on the path... or you'll die. If you are lapped twice... you will die. Do not touch the grass... or you will die. And only one will win. We then begin to meet some of our participants. Battling the same strain of cancer that cost both her mother and sister their lives, young Veronica (Brianna Lauren Jackson) has just learned the good news that her cancer is in remission. We next see Veronica with the rest of the chosen participants, but then something surprising and unexpected happens... her head explodes! You see, Veronica was breaking the grass rule and a powerful jolt of electricity was forced through her body as a result. With our presumed heroine out of the way in the first ten minutes, this establishes the feeling that this is truly anyone's game.








Our main characters are a pair of friends; Justin (Paul McCarthy-Boyington) and Eddie (Eddie McGee), army vets who'd both served during the "War on Terror" in Afghanistan where Eddie had one of his legs blown off (and Justin saved him), plus a meek deaf woman (Trista Robinson) who eventually toughens up and her also-deaf friend (T. Arthur Cottam). As disembodied voices telling the number of remaining players go through everyone's head, some try to stay rational and calm, but other "contestants" freak out and start turning on and / or murdering the others. One man (Fred Coury) begins a mad dash to try to kill off as many people as he can, irregardless of whether they're young and confused (like a teen girl and her kid brother), 8-months pregnant or old and weak (like an old man saddled with a walker). Before miraculously appearing in the game, everyone was on the same city street and saw a flash of bright white light. A priest (B. Anthony Cohen) thinks they're in purgatory, but other forces may be at play.





For a super low-budget independent feature (which began with an online kickstarter campaign), this isn't bad at all and shows plenty of promise. One of the big reasons I prefer watching older films is the photography. Nowadays, all of these digitally-shot genre films have the same exact dark, dreary sheen to them. I'm also consistently disheartened by the liberal use of seizure-cam that filmmakers use as a crutch to cheaply give their movie a sense of excitement and urgency. This movie is no exception to those rules: it looks exactly like every other cheap film coming out these days and the cameraman frequently appears to be suffering from Parkinson's disease. It also suffers from highly uneven acting (though I've seen much, much worse), dialogue and CGI effects (this can now safely hold down the record for the largest number of CGI head explosions) and a few misjudged scenes that simply do not work. However, these guys clearly did the best they could given their budget limitations and deserve high marks for that, as well as coming up with a consistently entertaining (and sometimes genuinely surprising) plot.



This was the feature debut of director Paul Hough, who's the son of director John Hough; a man whose credits included the Hammer vampire movie Twins of Evil (1971), the haunted house classic The Legend of Hell House (1973) and the Disney productions Escape to Witch Mountain (1975) and The Watcher in the Woods (1980). Paul had previously directed music videos, several shorts and the award-winning backyard wrestling documentary The Backyard (2002).

★★1/2

Saturday, January 11, 2014

House of Mystery (1961)

... aka: Das Landhaus des Dr. Lemming (The Country House of Dr. Lemming)

Directed by:
Vernon Sewell

One can't get their hopes up too high when the opening credits contain the four words "Directed by Vernon Sewell." Not to come down too hard on this guy, but his track record in Brit horror is pretty weak, especially considering the amount of talent he frequently got to work with. I'll always associate Mr. Sewell with two films in particular. The first is THE BLOOD BEAST TERROR (1968), a poor and sometimes downright inept monster movie which was such an unpleasant experience for stars Peter Cushing and Robert Flemyng that both lambasted the film in later interviews. Flemyng didn't have many nice things to say about the film nor the director, while Cushing would go on record as calling it the worst film he'd ever appeared in. The second and more distressing film as far as lost opportunities are concerned was the occult chiller THE CRIMSON CULT (1968). It's one thing to make a crappy horror film, but it's another thing to have actors Christopher Lee, Boris Karloff, Barbara Steele and Michael Gough at your disposal and still make a crappy horror film. Other than that, Sewell was responsible for the blandly passably Ghost Ship (1952) and a few other genre offerings I've not yet seen like The Ghosts of Berkeley Square (1947) and The Horrors of Burke and Hare (1972). House of Mystery, currently coming it at a 6.6 / 10, is his highest rated horror film on IMDb. Taking that into consideration I was hoping this would rise above the rest of his work. The good news is that it does. The not-so-good news it that it doesn't by all that much.







Alan (Ronald Hines) and his new wife (Colette Wilde) are looking into buying a home and stumble upon a deal that's too good to be true. Orchard Cottage is a large country estate on the market for just 2500 dollars and, though it'll need some thorough cleaning, that's still an absolute steal. But just why is it so cheap? Well, soft-spoken caretaker Stella (Jane Hylton) is pretty blunt about its reputation: "No one's taken it because of the ghost." She then goes into a series of flashbacks explaining the home's sordid history. Once a farm house, Orchard Cottage was purchased by eccentric hermit and electronics expert / engineer Mark Lemming (Peter Dyneley), who converted it all over to electricity. There was a rumor going around town that Mark's wife was having an affair with Clive Mayhew (John Merivale); a family friend who was staying with them. Both the wife and the friend mysteriously disappeared and, six months later, Mark himself was found dead; ironically electrocuted to death. It was written off as an accident in the coroner's report, a distant relative inherited the place and then turned around and sold it to young couple Harry (Maurice Kaufmann) and June (Nanette Newman) Trevor. It isn't long before strange and creepy things begin happening in the home.







The lights constantly flicker on and off, but inspection by an electrician proves there's nothing wrong with the wiring. June spots a man standing by the window in the living room, but he promptly disappears. The same man's image shows up on a TV screen, but a call to the TV station to verify it proves that no such man was on the program they were watching. Psychic investigator Mr. Burdon (Colin Gordon) shows up armed with all kinds of gadgets to help. Using a camera and light meter, he's able to pick up on strange vibrations in the living room where most of the supernatural events have been taking place. A photograph of Mark Lemming confirms their worst fears: the dead man is the same man they've been spotting around the house. Burdon calls in psychic Mrs. Bucknall (Molly Urquhart) to have a séance and then we get involved in a flashback-inside-a-flashback detailing Mark's revenge against his wife and her lover, who were both plotting to kill him for his money.







Mystery runs just 54 minutes, played as a second feature in British cinemas and was also screened in Germany under the title Das Landhaus des Dr. Lemming ("The Country House of Dr. Lemming"). Because of its compact run-time, it turned up here in America as an episode of the TV series Kraft Mystery Theatre. 

Though modest, ultimately predictable and nothing spectacular, it's well-acted and at least manages to maintain interest in several different ways. First, there are some interesting and well-thought-out scientific explanations for the ghostly phenomena as opposed to the then-typical "it is what it is" matter-of-fact approach. Second, the instruments used by Mr. Burdon to sniff out the presence of ghosts - which are pretty much the norm in numerous films and TV reality shows like Ghost Hunters and Ghost Adventures these days - were fresh concepts when this was made. Finally, how the engineer goes about getting his revenge is pretty ingenious. Apparently this was based (sans credit) on a play called "L'Angoisse" written by Pierre Mills and Celia de Vylars, which Sewell had already adapted two other times; as the short The Medium in 1934 and as the feature Latin Quarter (aka Frenzy) in 1945.

★★1/2

Horror Recs Challenge 2014: Week 1 (January 1-7)

Yes, I meant to get this up 4 days ago when I should have, but you know how life is... So I'm off to a pretty good start on the recs challenge and managed to knock out nine films my first week, so here they are, plus some notes on each one.
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Chop (2011; Trent Haaga) [Viewed Jan. 7]
This was better and more ambitious than I was expecting considering the extremely low budget, the general lack of attention it has received and the fact it involves numerous Troma alumni. Will Keenan (Tromeo and Juliet) stars as former crackhead Lance, who is terrorized by a mysterious, nameless man (Timothy Muskatell) who demands acknowledgment for something he had done to him in the past... only Lance cannot remember the guy or what he's supposedly done. This is a prime example of just how important a good screenplay is to a successful film; most especially a micro budget digital film that doesn't have the luxury to hide behind technical gloss and big name stars. The lead actors (especially Muskatell) are quite good and there are some genuinely hilarious moments in here as well as some gruesome scenes (played up for laughs mostly). This doesn't always walk that fine line between black comedy and torture-horror effortlessly (and becomes a little tedious in spots), but I liked it overall. Interestingly, this was released on the "Bloody Disgusting Selects" label and is given a glowing 4 Star Review on the Bloody Disgusting website. I call that Deja V/H/S. [USA] [Rec'd by shaza123] ★★1/2
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Death Stop Holocaust (2009; Justin Russell) [Viewed Jan. 6]
Two college girls head to one's family vacation home on an island and are terrorized by a group of masked rapists / murderers. I don't like hating on this one cause I'm an Ohio boy and this was filmed in Cleveland but... meh. Kinda tired of these wanna-be throwback 'Grindhouse' films. 70s 'Our Feature Presentation' logo at the beginning? Check. Fake film grain? Check. Frequent fake film image burning out? Check. Intentionally wobbly camerawork and jagged editing? Check. 'Homaging' everything under the sun to the point where it completely lacks its own identity? Check. This one starts out alright and the photography and score are promising in spots, but it's mostly just dark and dreary (as opposed to scary and suspenseful), becomes extremely repetitive and then refuses to ever explain anything. About midway through I found myself bored... watching the clock... waiting for it all to end. Didn't care what happened to the main characters and the others had neither personality nor motive. All that said, I saw enough good here to believe this director is fully capable of something better if he'd just shake the Quentin Tarantino out of his system. [USA] [Rec'd by shaza123] ★★
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Grabbers (2012; Jon Wright) [Viewed: Jan. 5]
Characters being yanked off-screen during shakycam monster attacks > picturesque shot of the Irish countryside > cutesy scene of the leads and their budding romance > picturesque shot of the Irish countryside > scene perpetuating the drunken Irish stereotype > picturesque shot of the Irish countryside. Rinse and repeat. Was this actually made by the Ireland Tourism Board or something? I started doing a full review for my blog and when I went over the screen caps I'd done, I noticed 75 percent of them were pretty scenic shots of the hills and ocean instead of the monsters or characters. I guess that says it all right there. Still, this is a harmless and somewhat amiable old-fashioned formula comic monster movie about alien squid thingys. On the downside, there are no real surprises, the humor is hit-or-miss and it strives for a lightweight tone yet sets that up against a dark, rainy atmosphere; a contrast that doesn't really work. On the plus side, the cast is decent, some of the dialogue is snappy and the CGI effects are well-executed for the budget. What I found most odd of all was its extreme fixation on drinking. I guess that's an Irish thing. The lead policeman character is a drunk and it's portrayed as being bad and negative, yet the supporting characters are mostly drunks themselves and they are shown as being harmless, quirky, fun-loving and extremely happy people. I'm not quite sure what to make of that. [Ireland / UK] [Rec'd by: Nan00k] ★★1/2
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Kalevet (Rabies) (2010; Aharon Keshales and Navot Papushado) [Viewed Jan. 7]
A small group of people - a pair of siblings, a park ranger, four teenagers, two cops - all end up in the woods with a psycho killer. Sound familiar? Absolutely. I even chuckled at how many people were dressed in immaculate white outfits at the start because I just knew they were gonna get all bloody. However, I doubt that anyone will anticipate how this film plays all its cards and in what order, most especially given the tired slasher set-up. I'd be a jerk to say why that is, so I won't. I will simply note that the filmmakers play up on cliches and our expectations to surprise us and, for the most part, they managed to pull it off. There are some definite echoes of Eden Lake here, but the unpredictability of how everything pans out is the ace up its sleeve. From what I've heard, this is the very first slasher / horror flick produced in Israel and I must say they are off to a pretty good start. [Israel] [Rec'd by peeptoad13] ★★★
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Nekeddo burâddo: Megyaku (Naked Blood) (1996; Hisayasu Sato) [V. Jan. 4] 
I am still trying to process this one days later and I guess that's a good thing. There's a teen scientist using young ladies involved in a contraception study as his guinea pigs, girls infected with an untested extreme-pain-causes-extreme-pleasure drug self-mutilating themselves in disgusting ways, another girl who shares a virtual reality dream world with a cactus (?!), a possible ghost, several plot twists, flashbacks and other odd stuff going down in here. So does the director bring it all together at the end? No, not really; at least not in a way someone aside from himself is really gonna get. However, he does create genuine interest and provokes some thought, so he gets kudos for that much. There are some major gore moments in this one, as well, including an eyeball scene that makes the similar (and much more undeservedly famous) one in Hostel look positively lightweight by comparison. For a full review and screen caps CLICK HERE. [Japan] [Rec'd by alchemie666] ★★1/2
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Retribution (1987; Guy Magar) [Viewed Jan. 3]
Not a great script, but it's extremely bold and vivid, nicely shot and I liked the affection the director showed for his characters. There are several inventive murder/gore scenes in here and the whole tacky and colorful aesthetic was simultaneously stylish and amusing. Oh yes, and an out-of-left-field reggae musical number and visit to "Doctor Rasta" does not hurt matters any either. I think most 80s horror fans will get some enjoyment out of it. For a full review and screen caps CLICK HERE. [USA] [Rec'd by Matheny85] ★★1/2
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Sennentuntschi: Curse of the Alps (2010; Michael Steiner) [Viewed Jan. 7] 
*PICK OF THE WEEK* This was precisely the type of gem I was hoping to discover on this list; one I'd never even heard of before that I know I'll be revisiting in the future and recommending to others. Set primarily in 1975 (though there are modern scenes bookmarking the film), the plot involves a seductive, half-feral young woman (Roxane Mesquida) who shows up in a mountainous Swiss village and may or may not be responsible for a series of odd occurrences and deaths. This film does a very good job building up intrigue and keeping you guessing. We are never quite sure if the central female is actually a vengeful witch who makes dolls from human flesh (the "sennentuntschi" of the title) or just an abused and misunderstood amnesiac stuck in a region full of highly superstitious and religious people prone to lashing out at anyone different. The scenery and photography are both gorgeous, the acting is really good and the characters are interesting and well-defined. The only thing I disliked was how the plot and timeline were disassembled and rearranged, which was unnecessary and caused needless confusion at times. Otherwise, a very good film well worth seeking out. [Switzerland] [Rec'd by triggerhappy6] ★★★1/2
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Stalled (2013; Christian James) [Viewed Jan. 6]
A pretty good premise (man trapped in a high rise office building's ladies restroom during a Christmas party as a zombie outbreak begins), some gore and OK zombie makeups, but it's spoiled by a terrible, charisma-free, completely unlikable lead actor (Dan Palmer) and awful dialogue provided by the same man in what is clearly a vanity project made by someone who fancies himself the next Simon Pegg. Keep trying there, buddy. Or better yet, just stop. I hate even bringing up Shawn of the Dead, but someone needs to tell Kim Newman to stop comparing every single British horror comedy to it just so he can get his name plastered on DVD covers and then I'll stop bringing it up myself. There are a couple of good gags in here, but way more extremely lame ones that don't work at all. And when it tries to go all deep and profound at the end, it's so forced, obvious and corny that you're likely to get a nice view of your ceiling as your eyes fall back into your skull. So this really could have been pretty good with a few alterations (new lead actor, re-written script), but I feel they pretty much botched the most important stuff. [UK] [Rec'd by sdaveak46] ★1/2
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El Vampiro, El (The Vampire) (1957; Fernando Méndez) [Viewed Jan. 2]
Though el vampiro is "Count Lavud" nee "Mr. Duval," this seems like a pretty direct, by-the-numbers remake of Dracula. Much was swiped from the Universal film - too much for my liking really - but what it lacks in originality it somewhat makes up for by being nicely atmospheric. The art direction and sets are good, there's lots of swirling fog and some well-composed shots in here. The cast is decent, though I don't think Germán Robles will be making anyone forget Bela Lugosi or Christopher Lee anytime soon. An Edgar Allan Poe-ish subplot helps liven up the finale. For a full review and screen caps CLICK HERE. [Mexico] [Rec'd by Zombie_CPA] ★★1/2
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So there you have it. Week One in the can and I'll keep chipping away at THE LIST till I get this done. 

JAN. 1 - 7 STATS:
FTV (First Time Views) - 9
Repeat Views: 0
Total: 9 / 174

Horror Recs Challenge 2014

I've decided to take part in IMDb's Horror Recs Challenge this year hosted by Zombie_CPA. For the list, 32 users have each selected 6 films (currently 192 total) apiece that they feel more people need to see. The goal of the challenge is to not only shed light on some under-loved films, but also to view as many films from the list as possible throughout the year and also to try to get your recommendations on as many end-of-the-year best lists as you can. The end-of-the-year lists are broken down into two categories: Top 5 Favorite First Time Views and Top 3 Favorite Repeat Views. My personal selections for the challenge were THE STRANGE WORLD OF COFFIN JOE (1968), A WARNING TO THE CURIOUS (1972), BEWITCHED (1981), LITAN (1982), DEJA VU (1987) and MAGIC COP (1990), so only time will tell whether or not others like these as much as I do. I'm going to try to get to as many of these as possible, but I'm not going to do full reviews for all of them. Like usual, I'm going to concentrate my energies on films made between 1950 and 1990.

THE LIST:

 001. Strangler of the Swamp (1946) (Zombie_CPA)
 002. Woman Who Came Back, The (1945) (Zombie_CPA)
 003. Kuroneko (The Black Cat) (1968) (Zombie_CPA) *
 004. Vampiro, El (The Vampire) (1957) (Zombie_CPA)
 005. Kyuketsuki Gokemidoro (Goke, Body Snatcher from Hell) (1968) (Zombie_CPA)
 006. Vampire Bat, The (1933) (Zombie_CPA) *
 007. Do-ga-ni (Silenced) (2011) (shaza123)
 008. Possédées du diable, Les (Lorna the Exorcist) (1974) (shaza123)
 009. Hexen bis aufs Blut gequält (Mark of the Devil) (1970) (shaza123) *
 010. Death Stop Holocaust (2009) (shaza123)
 011. Chop (2011) (shaza123)
 012. Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (1977) (shaza123) *
 013. Odd Thomas (2013) (sdaveak47)
 014. Big Ass Spider! (2013) (sdaveak47)
 015. Open Grave (2013) (sdaveak47)
 016. Banshee Chapter, The (2013) (sdaveak47)
 017. Insensibles (2012) (sdaveak47)
 018. Stalled (2013) (sdaveak47)
 019. Angst (1983) (peeptoad13) *
 020. Kalevet (Rabies) (2010) (peeptoad13)
 021. Killer's Moon (1978) (peeptoad13)
 022. Motel Hell (1980)(peeptoad13) *
 023. Rituals (1977)(peeptoad13) *
 024. I Drink Your Blood (1970)(peeptoad13) *
 025. Psychos in Love (1987)(Matheny85) *
 026. Modus Anomali (Ritual) (2012) (Matheny85)
 027. Blood Song (Dream Slayer) (1982) (Matheny85)
 028. Strangeness, The (1985) (Matheny85) *
 029. Carrier, The (1988) (Matheny85) *
 030. Retribution (1987) (Matheny85)
 031. Crowhaven Farm (1970) (zedzeek)
 032. Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things (1971) (zedzeek)
 033. Love Me Deadly (1973) (zedzeek) *
 034. Night Strangler, The (1973) (zedzeek) *
 035. Symptoms (Blood Virgin) (1974) (zedzeek) *
 036. House of Mortal Sin (The Confessional) (1976) (zedzeek) *
 037. Películas para no dormir: Cuento de navidad (Films to Keep You Awake: The Christmas Tale) (2005) (Mikey_Elite)
 038. Telling, The (2009) (Mikey_Elite)
 039. How To Make A Monster (2001) (Mikey_Elite) *
 040. All About Evil (2010) (Mikey_Elite)
 041. Tormented (2009) (Mikey_Elite)
 042. Breed, The (2006) (Mikey_Elite)
 043. Dust Devil (1992) (jimb14red)
 044. Society (1989) (jimb14red)
 045. Nuit de la mort!, La (Night of Death) (1980) (jimb14red)
 046. Thirst (1979) (jimb14red)
 047. Stridulum (The Visitor) (1979) (jimb14red)
 048. Psychomania (1973) (jimb14red)
 049. Scream of Fear (Taste of Fear) (1961) (Qwertyman3)
 050. Nuda per Satana (Nude for Satan) (1974) (Qwertyman3)
 051. Perché quelle strane gocce di sangue sul corpo di Jennifer? (The Case of the Bloody Iris)  (1972) (Qwertyman3)
 052. Undead, The (1957) (Qwertyman3) *
 053. Don't Go in the House (1979) (Qwertyman3) *
 054. Blood for Dracula (Andy Warhol's Dracula) (1974) (Qwertyman3)
 055. Isle Of The Dead (1945) (Tromafreak) *
 056. Comedy Of Terrors, The (1963) (Tromafreak)
 057. Don't Deliver Us From Evil (1971)(Tromafreak)
 058. Squirm (1976) (Tromafreak) *
 059. Last House In The Woods (2006) (Tromafreak)
 060. Wither (2012) (Tromafreak)
 061. Môjû (Blind Beast) (1969) (Nan00k)
 062. Grabbers (2012) (Nan00k)
 063. 100 Bloody Acres (2012) (Nan00k)
 064. Dead Set (2008) (Nan00k)
 065. Dans ma peau (In My Skin) (2002) (Nan00k) *
 066. Children, The (2008) (Nan00k)
 067. Gu (Bewitched) (1982) (capkronos) *
 068. Litan (1982) (capkronos) *
 069. O Estranho Mundo de Zé do Caixão (The Strange World of Coffin Joe) (1968) (capkronos) *
 070. Qu mo jing cha (Magic Cop) (1990) (capkronos) *
 071. Vec vidjeno (Deja vu; Reflections) (1987) (capkronos) *
 072. Warning to the Curious, A (1972) (capkronos) *
 073. Nattevagten (Nightwatch) (1994) (Reverend_Kane)
 074. Happy Birthday to Me (1981) (Reverend_Kane) *
 075. Ugly, The (1997)(Reverend_Kane) *
 076. Sigaw (The Echo) (2004) (Reverend_Kane)
 077. Residencia, La (The House That Screamed) (1969) (Reverend_Kane) *
 078. Evil, The (1978) (Reverend_Kane)
 079. House of Mystery (1961) (emertens)
 080. Occhio dietro la parete, L' (Eyes Behind the Wall) (1977) (emertens)
 081. Neither the Sea Nor the Sand (1972) (emertens)
 082. Goodbye Gemini (Twinsanity) (1970) (emertens)
 083. Couch, The (1962) (emertens)
 084. Flexing with Monty (2010) (emertens)
 085. Witch Who Came From the Sea, The (1976) (psychotronicbeatnik) *
 086. Ganja and Hess (Black Vampire) (1973) (psychotronicbeatnik)
 087. Eternal, The (Trance) (1998) (psychotronicbeatnik)
 088. What's the Matter With Helen? (1971) (psychotronicbeatnik)
 089. Zeder (Revenge of the Dead) (1983) (psychotronicbeatnik)
 090. Rosso segno della follia, Il (Hatchet for the Honeymoon) (1970) (psychotronicbeatnik) *
 091. Brain Damage (1988) (alchemie666) *
 092. Dance of the Damned (1989) (alchemie666) *
 093. Strippers vs Werewolves (2012) (alchemie666)
 094. American Mary (2012) (alchemie666) *
 095. Byzantium (2012) (alchemie666)
 096. Nekeddo burâddo: Megyaku (Naked Blood) (1996) (alchemie666)
 097. Twisted Nerve (1968) (lost-in-limbo) *
 098. Diabólica malicia (What the Peeper Saw) (1971) (lost-in-limbo)
 099. Girly (Mumsy, Nanny, Sonny & Girly) (1970) (lost-in-limbo) *
 100. Yuan Zhen-Xia yu Wei Si-Li (The Seventh Curse) (1986) (lost-in-limbo)
 101. Sender, The (1982) (lost-in-limbo) *
 102. Forgotten One, The (1989) (lost-in-limbo) *
 103. Of Unknown Origin (1983) (yohumbug)
 104. Special Effects (1984) (yohumbug)
 105. Geomi sup (Spider Forest) (2004) (yohumbug)
 106. Tower of Evil (Horror on Snape Island) (1972) (yohumbug) *
 107. Queen of Blood (Planet of Blood) (1966) (yohumbug)
 108. Lost Things (2003) (yohumbug)
 109. You gui zi (The Oily Maniac) (1976) (ninjas-r-cool)
 110. Bôkô Kirisaki Jakku (Assault! Jack the Ripper) (1976) (ninjas-r-cool)
 111. Wild beasts - Belve feroci (The Wild Beasts) (1984) (ninjas-r-cool)
 112. Baxter (1989) (ninjas-r-cool) *
 113. Bride of Frank, The (1996) (ninjas-r-cool)
 114. Plaga zombie: Zona mutante (Plaga Zombie: Mutant Zone) (2001) (ninjas-r-cool)
 115. Splinter (2008) (DeaconFrost666)
 116. Rabid (1977) (DeaconFrost666) *
 117. Visiting Hours (1982) (DeaconFrost666) *
 118. Scalpel (False Face) (1977) (DeaconFrost666)
 119. Wolf Creek (2005) (DeaconFrost666) *
 120. Trick r Treat (2007) (DeaconFrost666) *
 121. Man Who Changed His Mind, The (1936) (TheFiendsThatPlagueThee)
 122. House of Horrors (1946) (TheFiendsThatPlagueThee)
 123. Cult of the Cobra (1955) (TheFiendsThatPlagueThee) *
 124. Witchcraft (1964) (TheFiendsThatPlagueThee) *
 125. Craze (Demon Master) (1974) (TheFiendsThatPlagueThee)
 126. Cthulhu (2000) (TheFiendsThatPlagueThee)
 127. Aku no kyôten (Lesson of the Evil) (2012) (NoseOfNicko)
 128. Deathdream (Dead of Night) (1972) (NoseOfNicko) *
 129. Father's Day (2011) (NoseOfNicko)
 130. Macabre (Darah) (2009) (NoseOfNicko)
 131. Shiryô no wana (Evil Dead Trap) (1988) (NoseOfNicko) *
 132. Blood Feast 2 (2002) (NoseOfNicko)
 133. Through The Looking Glass (1976) (morrison-dylan-fan) *
 134. Invisible Ghost (1941) (morrison-dylan-fan) *
 135. Black Snake (1973) (morrison-dylan-fan)
 136. Reptile, The (1966) (morrison-dylan-fan) *
 137. 1920 (2008) (morrison-dylan-fan)
 138. Deranged (1987) (morrison-dylan-fan) *
 139. Habitante incierto, El (The Uninvited Guest) (2004) (SomebodyWicked)
 140. Cadaver Christmas, A (2011) (SomebodyWicked)
 141. Sur le seuil (Evil Words) (2003) (SomebodyWicked)
 142. Heart of Midnight (1988) (SomebodyWicked)
 143. Madhouse (And When She Was Bad) (1981) (SomebodyWicked) *
 144. Sleepstalker: The Sandman's Last Rites (1995) (SomebodyWicked)
 145. Mute Witness (1994) (triggerhappy6) *
 146. Wai dor lei ah yut ho (Dream Home) (2010) (triggerhappy6)
 147. 13 game sayawng (13: Game of Death) (2006) (triggerhappy6)
 148. Sennentuntschi: Curse of the Alps (2010) (triggerhappy6)
 149. Ojos de Julia, Los (Julia's Eyes) (2010) (triggerhappy6)
 150. Sexykiller, morirás por ella (Sexykiller) (2008) (triggerhappy6)
 151. Fährmann Maria (Death and the Maiden) (1936) (jdidaco)
 152. Valkoinen peura (The White Reindeer) (1952) (jdidaco) *
 153. Hakujitsumu (Daydream) (1964) (jdidaco)
 154. Seidan botan-dôrô (Hellish Love) (1972) (jdidaco)
 155. Arrebato (Rapture) (1980) (jdidaco)
 156. Docteur Jekyll et les femmes (Bloodbath of Dr. Jekyll) (1981) (jdidaco)
 157. Nude per l'assassino (Strip Nude for Your Killer) (1975) (Hellraiserdisciple)
 158. Nightmare (1981) (Hellraiserdisciple) *
 159. Psycho Cop Returns (Psycho Cop 2) (1993) (Hellraiserdisciple) *
 160. Neon Maniacs (1986) (Hellraiserdisciple)
 161. Redeemer: Son of Satan!, The (Class Reunion Massacre) (1978) (Hellraiserdisciple)
 162. Night of the Eagle (Burn, Witch, Burn) (1962) (Hellraiserdisciple) *
 163. Portrait in Terror (1965) (Dr_Coffin)
 164. Yambaó (Cry of the Bewitched) (1957) (Dr_Coffin)
 165. Night Tide (1961) (Dr_Coffin)
 166. Tempi duri per i vampiri (Uncle Was A Vampire) (1959) (Dr_Coffin)
 167. Crucible of Horror (1971) (Dr_Coffin) *
 168. Eye of the Cat (1969) (Dr_Coffin)
 169. Davitelj protiv davitelja (Strangler vs. Strangler) (1984) (Shadowplayed)
 170. Ahí va el diablo (Here Comes the Devil) (2012) (Shadowplayed)
 171. Sin nombre, Los (The Nameless) (1999) (Shadowplayed)
 172. Isolation (2005) (Shadowplayed)
 173. Chained (2012) (Shadowplayed)
 174. Entity (2012) (Shadowplayed)
 175. Deliria (Stage Fright) (1987) (DaveHedgehog) *
 176. Freak Out (2004) (DaveHedgehog)
 177. Battery, The (2012) (DaveHedgehog)
 178. Scarecrows (1988) (DaveHedgehog)
 179. Popcorn (1991) (DaveHedgehog)
 180. Murder Party (2007) (DaveHedgehog)
 181. Borrower, The (1991) (ElijahCSkuggs) *
 182. Black Past (1989) (ElijahCSkuggs)
 183. Christmas Evil (1980) (ElijahCSkuggs) *
 184. Plankton (Creature of the Abyss) (1994) (ElijahCSkuggs)
 185. Cast a Deadly Spell (1991) (ElijahCSkuggs)
 186. There's Nothing Out There (1991) (ElijahCSkuggs) *
 187. Woman in Black, The (1989) (ns1crr) *
 188. Signalman, The (1976) (ns1crr) *
 189. Mientras duermes (Sleep Tight) (2011) (ns1crr)
 190. Frightmare (1974) (ns1crr) *
 191. I Know How Many Runs You Scored Last Summer (2008) (ns1crr)
 192. Breeders (1986) (ns1crr) *

* = Seen prior to 2014. The ones I've already reviewed here are linked.

_________________________________________________________

The above list is going to inform most of my viewing these next few months. Thankfully, many are films I wanted to see, anyway, or ones I'd wanted to re-watch and review here, so it's worked out quite well. Of course, first time views are going to be what I concentrate my energies on. I plan a weekly column documenting my progress as the year progresses, which will be posted shortly. 

Friday, January 10, 2014

She Freak (1967)

... aka: Alley of Nightmares
... aka: Asylum of the Insane
... aka: Freaks!

Directed by:
Byron Mabe

Young waitress Jade Cochran (Claire Brennen), a sandy blonde with straight bangs, an upturned snout, sun-baked skin and a Steven Tyler mouth, turns heads at the cafe she works at. The redneck customers hit on her. Her sleazebag married boss - appropriately named Greasy (Claude "Smith" / Earl Jones) - hits on her. Everyone hits on her... but Jade wants something more. Raised in a dirt poor household in dusty Texas with a miserable mom who had eight other kids to raise, Jade is determined to make it and, according to her, she'll beg, lie, cheat and steal to get where she wants to be in life. Show promoter Ben Thomas (Ben Moore) comes in to get a bite to eat and asks to hang a poster. From him, Jade learns that a carnival is about to pass through town, and she figures that may be the next step to getting her life turned around. You hear that, kids. If you want to make something of yourself, forget about college; just go join a sleazy traveling carnival instead. When Greasy finds out Jade plans on ditching her job there, he has a few kind parting words for her: "Get out of here you carnival tramp... I don't want you givin' my customers no disease!"








Jade goes to see the carnival owner Al Babcock (Vanteen), and ends up getting a job as a waitress. Customers and her new boss like the fact she "has it together." She meets Moon Mullins (Lynn Courtney), a friendly strip-tease artist who dances as lewdly as the law allows in her fringe-covered bikini at a burlesque review. Looking for a roommate, Moon suggests she and Jade split costs on a motel room and warns her to stay away from studly, womanizing ride foreman Blackie Fleming (Lee Raymond). So what does Jade do? Why, she immediately heads right out after Blackie and the two end up literally rockin' his trailer. Soon after, she finds out about a bigger fish in the pond in the form of Steve St. John (Bill McKinney), a wealthy middle-aged widower who owns the freak show exhibit that Jade can't stand going into. Though she thinks "They're disgusting!" and nice guy Steve is a freak sympathizer, he has a vacation home in Tampa, a brand new black Cadillac and other such perks that come along with snagging him. Jade decides to make her move and soon enough the two are married... but the new bride can't resist the passion Blackie has to offer and resumes her affair with him behind her husband's back. Could death, revenge, a fitting disfigurement and a bible quote be too far in the future?







This is a very blatant rip-off of Tod Browning's classic Freaks (1932) stripped of that film's quirky insight, its memorable cast, its humanity and its chilling finale. It begins the same way with a disclaimer followed by an opening sequence where a carnival barker (played by an uncredited David F. Friedman, who also wrote and produced) is about to present a disturbing human freak not for kids or those with nervous disorders, weak hearts or queasy stomachs. Said exhibit turns out to be the leading lady after the freaks get done with her, just as it panned out for Olga Baclanova in Browning's film. Speaking of freaks, this film barely even features them! We get to see a couple of dwarfs, a geek, a "herpetologist hypnotist" and a sword swallower briefly, but that's it. No amazing real-life "mistakes of nature" like the Browning film. Zero characterization. No glimpses into their lives. They simply come out during the rushed finale to teach the greedy Jade a lesson. Instead of focusing on them, time is padded out with endless montages of customers doing ordinary things at the carnival (riding rides, playing games) and the workers setting things up, all set to a sleep-inducing light jazz score. It's pretty boring aside from some amusing bits of dialogue here and there and the final unveiling of the "She Freak" (admittedly a very good make-up job for the time).








Felix Silla co-stars as a nosy dwarf named Shorty. Rumor has it that he and Brennen carried on a secret affair for nearly a decade after this was made until her untimely death from cancer in 1977 at age 43. The cast also includes William Bagdad as a toothless drunk who gets a screwdriver jammed into his hand during a fight and the director as a police officer. For a 1971 reissue, director Donn Davison added a few minutes worth of 3D effects and it was released under the new title Asylum of the Insane. It's on DVD from Something Weird.

★1/2
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